What’s blocking our connection with our creativity?

Amauri Mejia (via upsplash)

As humans we’re all born innately creative. It’s how we express who we are. However, all too often this natural urge is suppressed because of beliefs we have picked up throughout the course of our lives. This (often subconscious) rejection of our creativity can leave us feeling frustrated, uneasy and as if something fundamental is missing from our lives. I’m excited to share with you why I believe creativity is so important in our everyday lives and unpick some of the stories we often carry so that we can all (re)discover our creativity and embrace a life that is filled with curiosity, creativity, meaning & joy. 

WHAT IS CREATIVITY & WHY IS IT IMPORTANT?

Creativity very simply is the act of putting two or more things together. What makes this so interesting is that we all have different ways of doing it; this is where our unique expression comes into play. Whether it is in the way that we pair words, ideas, put food together, clothes together or decorate our house, each of these creative activities has our unique stamp on it. 

It is in our human nature to express ourselves, and it starts from the moment we are born. As a child I loved playing in the sandpit in our garden, I’d spend hours making sandcastles and tunnels, creating worlds out of sand. I also loved dancing in the rain, playing schools and pretending I had a shop. Creativity was at the heart of my days.

Sadly, as we start school creativity and play are slowly replaced by more academic subjects. Using our creativity becomes narrowed down to a small percentage of our day or week. We are taught that there are more important things to do than follow our curious and creative nature. 

To connect with our creativity makes us feel whole; it’s how we share who we are with the world; how we connect with others and find meaning in the world around us. It’s not surprising then that if we don’t express our creativity, and instead suppress it, feelings of resentment, frustration, and uneasiness bubble up to the surface. We may even feel fear, anger or grief because we are not only denying ourselves true connection with others, but also with ourselves and our true nature.

WHAT’S BLOCKING OUR CONNECTION WITH OUR CREATIVITY?

You won’t be surprised to hear then that I believe passionately in maintaining this connection to our creativity in order that we can live as our fully expressed selves and live a life that feels wholehearted, fulfilling and joyful. To get there we need to understand the stories we hold around creativity and how they are holding us back, here are some examples that you may relate to. 

Very often when I talk to people about creativity they say one of the following; ‘I’m not creative’, or ‘I loved art at school until a teacher criticised my work and my confidence was really knocked’; or ‘I wish I was more creative but I think it’s too late now, I’m too old’; or ‘I was encouraged to do more academic subjects at school, subjects that would lead to a reliable job, so art fell by the wayside’. The latter statement describes me. My school praised academia, so despite loving everything about art and the sanctuary of the art department with it’s smell, the relaxed nature of the space, how it presented an opportunity to be messy & experiment, I was encouraged to study History of Art. 

Being the ‘good girl’ and keen to please those who were giving me their valuable advice I diligently went along with this safe suggestion. 

Now, don’t get me wrong, History of Art is a great subject to study, but I felt this path wasn’t quite right for ME. And I was right, so weighed down was I by the expectations that I felt I did incredibly badly in my History exam, twice. 

Slowly, I began to see that in a strange way I had saved myself by failing. I used to write in my diary every night. This was an opportunity to spill the tangled web of my thoughts out of my head and onto a page and slowly an idea grew as I wrote. What if I didn’t want to study other artists, but wanted to make the art myself? What would THAT route look like? I remember clearly the feeling of this realisation; it felt exciting and expansive. It felt like every cell in my body was tingling; my whole body was saying ‘YES this is your path to follow’. It felt as though I was honouring a deep desire and need within me to create, rather than consume what others had created. It was such a welcomed feeling after having felt so constricted walking the path of should’s and expectations; living a life that didn’t feel like mine. Now I had agency over my life and it came from following my creativity.  

Another barrier I believe plays a big part in blocking our connection with our creativity is how we perceive creativity within The Arts. Creativity is very often seen as something that is confined to the act of painting, drawing, printmaking or making music. 

When creativity is seen to be contained within such strict parameters, it can feel alienating, intimidating & exclusive. But it simply isn’t true that creativity only lies within these walls. It is in fact infused within your everyday living. Living is inherently creative. Examples of everyday creativity are; deciding what to wear in the morning, deciding where to go for a walk, choosing how to move your body in a yoga class and creating a playlist.

Remember, being creative it the simple act of putting two or more things together. These are all decisions & choices made through you and by you; you are making choices that express your thoughts, ideas, your preferences and your taste in things. 

With each decision you are expressing and learning about yourself; deepening your sense of self. With awareness, attention and intention we can draw these creative acts out, and life immediately begins to feel a little (or a lot) more joyful, fulfilling and brimming with creative possibilities & opportunities.

You may be able to relate to one of the stories above or not, but you are likely to be familiar with this idea, that because of how deeply connected creativity is to us and who we are, when we put something we have created out into the world you can feel very very vulnerable. So fearful are we of the comments of others, the desire to fit in and be accepted, it can often feel safer to reject our creativity completely and live a safe life. 

But the price we pay is that we lose a part of ourselves, and that simply won’t do, so I have some suggestions for you on how you can step forward into your creativity. 

HOW DO WE UNBLOCK AND RECONNECT WITH OUR CREATIVITY?

I have experienced many times in my life where my creativity has been stuck. I see it in my clients too. The stories blocking us rear their heads clamping down on any motivation or inspiration we had. However with awareness of these stories there is a way through. I tend to talk directly to my critical thoughts - ‘thank you for trying to keep me safe from making a fool of myself,’ I say ‘but it’s not necessary, I’ve got this.’ and I keep going.

With a clearer mind and the stories placated creativity will naturally flow in whatever form it takes. It can be helpful to ask, what did you love to do as a child?; what made you stop?, and how can you bring it back into your life in some form? What would you need around you to do that thing that brought you joy, and allowed you to express yourself so naturally?

Follow that. 

And practice; allow yourself to be a beginner and learn from your mistakes, just as you did as a child. 

By bringing your creativity back into the heart of your days, and by following your curious and creative nature I can assure you that you’ll find your own path to a richer and more fulfilling life. 

Further reading; 

  • Big Magic - Elizabeth Gilbert

  • The Artist’s Way - Julia Cameron

  • The Gifts of Imperfection - Brene Brown

  • The War of Art - Steven Pressfield

  • Conscious Creativity - Philippa Stanton

Further watching / listening; 

  • Do Schools Kill Creativity? - Sir Ken Robinson - TED talk

  • Magic Lessons with Elizabeth Gilbert - Podcast series

*** This article was originally written for Verity Gaida’s fabulous e-magazine Inspire & Enjoy, Sept 2020 ***

What may be blocking your creativity

PHOTO: ISSIE FREEMAN

PHOTO: ISSIE FREEMAN

Recently a client came to me feeling totally overwhelmed, frustrated and lost.⁣⁣

She yearned to explore her creativity for herself personally and her business.⁣⁣

'I've lost my direction' she said, 'and my inner critic is really present at the moment. It's exhausting I can't seem to move forward'.⁣⁣
I listened quietly allowing space for her thoughts to tumble out; stories and beliefs she held about herself revealed themselves through the voice of her inner critic. ⁣

The inner critic was harsh and reminded me of a voice I had also heard in my own head less than a year before. She told me it was saying things like;⁣⁣

— It's too late to explore different avenues with your business & creativity; you're too old.⁣⁣
— It won't fit in with your life; its not practical.⁣⁣
— You'll fail; you're not brave enough; it'll be too hard.⁣⁣
— You don't have the time OR money.⁣⁣
— You'll look silly even trying.⁣⁣
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Familiar? Yep, to me too.⁣⁣
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It's the voice of fear as we step out of your comfort zone, try something new, reach for something which daunts us but also excites us at our core...and it can very often bring us to a complete and utter standstill.⁣⁣
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Recognising that our inner critic is only trying to keep us safe from harm is a huge turning point; it allows us to acknowledge, reassure and then disconnect from the self critical voices and take steps f o r w a r d.⁣